How much would you pay to look like you've been mugged?

After another day of adventure in Shanghai, China, I love that I have a picture like this to show off. Your probably wondering how I survived the brutal beating that left these marks on my back, but there is a good back story to war wounds.

Any good Chinese doctor can do this for you (or to you) . . . . read on for the story.

The pollution in Shanghai worked its magic on me and I've had a sinus infection here for quite a while. I was feeling pretty run down two weeks ago, so I went with a few Asian expat teachers to try out some of the traditional Chinese medicine (tmc) that they swore gets your body working properly again.

I went to a spa/tmc provider located in a gorgeous apartment area near People's Square. I went in with my friends (who could translate Chinese for me whew) and put on the little Chinese pajama-type clothes they give to customers who get Chinese massages. The tmc practitioner came out and held my wrist to feel what was wrong in my body. She asked me some questions about how long I had been sick, my sleeping, coughing, and other personal tibits. I'm sure plenty of what I said was lost in translation--I find that happens often. I say, "I've been coughing and feeling sick because the air is polluted" and they get "she's been staying up late and drinking. Those foreigners." Well, many foreigners do like to party here, but I've been sticking to a normal granny bedtime of 9:30 pm so I figured she was a little off base when she asked me if I like to stay up late. Like to and get to are two different things right?

Then the doc talked to a few of her helpers and told them to give me a massage, to use a special heat treatment to suck the cold out of me and get my qi (or engergy) balanced, and to perform Gua Sha. Now when someone translates this to you they say, "hey, if you want to feel better, you need to do Gua Sha," and you think, "okay. I want to feel better. Let's try it." Like signing up for a job in another country, you never know what you are signing up for until you get here.

What the heck is Gua Sha?

Well, Gua Sha means to scrape the fever or sickness from the body. What they did for me was to put oil on my back and take a rounded wooded object (almost like a shoe horn) and begin to put pressure on my back with the object and stroke my back with the that thing repeatedly. This combing left quite the marks on me as you can see from the picture. Did it hurt. Okay, yes it did.

Surprisingly, the marks faded in about 4 days and were gone in a week. Sure it was painful, but I survived. I think that its one of those things that if you did it a lot, it wouldn't feel so bad. For anyone that remembers having to run the timed mile in elementary, before we knew that people actually practice running to get better at it, getting the Gua Sha treatment is a lot easier (not quicker though).

Did it work. Hmmm. Hard to say. It did make me feel incredibly tired, like I had to listen to an audio tape on rock morphology while digging post holes. My brain was mush and my body was about there too. I was so tired after the combing or back beating as I like to call it that I probably got the best sleep I've had since I moved to China. I was too tired to think, dream, or worry. My cough and sickness went down considerably over the next few days. I couldn't tell if it was from the treatment or not. It made me wonder about the old doctor's advice: "Take this and you will be better in a week. If not, you will have to wait 7 days."

Either way, I got an hour massage, a meal, some interesting heat treatments to suck the cold out of my body (kinda like putting a warm stick on pressure points on your body), and a nice Gua Shan beating all for about $50 bucks. I think tomorrow I'll just go for the massage. That sets me back about $7 an hour. I'll let you know how it goes . . . I don't expect to look like I got hit by a moped after this one though.